Mr. Halladay of the Philadelphia ball club is a failure. He allowed a single runner to reach with a base on balls (BB on your score card). Surely, he had a fitful night’s sleep, realizing he had faced 28 batsmen, retiring a mere 27. Oh, the torment!
Darting splitters, cutters, sliders, curve balls were to no avail against the redoubtable Jay Bruce of the Red Legs, who shrewdly took first base from the flawed moundsman, who should seek help from PA (Perfectos Anonymous). Why, a vision of grandiosity is a sign of serious mental illness and should be addressed immediately by a qualified professional. Talk him down from the ledge, Doc.
Mr. Lee of the Dallas club stifled the Floridians, and the Pinstripers managed to squeeze the crème-filled center out of the Twinkies.
In other words, we went 0 for 3 in our pursuit of entertainment in this sporting life. However, another Florida bunch, the rogue Knights of Orlando, cut a swath through the fizzling Blazers of Birmingham, giving us entertainment in the scholar-athlete realm.
Take Pavano and the Twin Cities (the head of the Mississippi River is nearby, we believe) over Pettite and the bridge-bound Bronx (no thonx). Also, Lincecum of the city by the bay against Lowe of Scarlet O’Hara’s territory. Also, Wilson of the Lone Star state over Shields of the scary underwater critters of another bay.
Meanwhile, the bond market is sending a message. Yields keep falling. Which means economic growth is fragile and stocks have little upside from here. Use the mattress and take the soon-to-be Big 10 Nebraska Cornhuskers minus 11 over Kansas State, for entertainment purposes only.
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